I am a hell breathing fire monster and I will not totter | This Raging Light Book Review


This Raging Light is such a meaningful title and you won’t even understand until you read this book which should be reason enough to read this book.

*Disclaimer: This Raging Light by Estelle Laure was sent to me for free via the Kindle App, through NetGalley. I did not pay for this book and I am not being paid to review it, all opinions are mine and my thoughts have not been influenced in any way.*

The Raging Light by Estelle Laura is about the traumatic and eventful life of seventeen-year-old Lucille, who has lost both her parents and has to look after her younger sister, Wren, whilst looking after the house, working long hours and trying to keep up with school work. On top of this, she is in love with her best friend’s brother who is in a long-term relationship and people are starting to get suspicious as to where her parents are.

This Raging Light paperback is set to be available for purchase on Amazon for £7.99 on 30th June 2016; the hardcover has already been released and is £12.08 on Amazon.

The Blurb – (taken from Goodreads)
“How is it that you suddenly notice a person? How is it that one day Digby was my best friend’s admittedly cute twin brother, and then the next he stole air, gave jitters, and twisted my insides up? Lucille has bigger problems that falling for her best friend’s unavailable brother. Her mom has gone, leaving her to look after her sister, Wren. With bills mounting up and appearances to keep, Lucille is raging against her life but holding it together – just.”

The quotes are what made this book; little anecdotes and snippets of carefully crafted vocabulary, ordered in such a way to make you feel something.

The Quotes –

“I notice her now. I notice her isn’t. I notice her doesn’t.”

“Trust. What does it even mean? You hand somebody the knife to stab you with when you trust them. I know this much is true… My hand may have been shaking, but I had to give that stranger-girl the knife, even knowing how sharp it might be. Digby holds one knife. Eden another. And now Shane. That’s a lot of knife. I feel the prickle-tickle of the blades at my throat and hope the hands holding them are steady.”

“That’s the trouble with letting people help. It always costs somebody something.”

“Just because the crack doesn’t show doesn’t mean it’s not there.”

“Even though she is so sturdy, she looks infinitely breakable.”

“Eternity lives in pauses.”

“Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”

“Everything is more than one thing.”

“What man is such a coward he would rather not fall once than stand forever tottering? Most people totter their whole lives. They never let themselves fall, never take the hit. They just go along, trying to do what they think they’re supposed to. They never try to find out what’s true for them, because that would mean being brave in a way people aren’t.”

“He’s hobbled by his own good heart.”

“My scream gets sucked up by the night’s black.”

“Thoughts are hard to catch. Everything drifts.”

“Potential hypothetical death is way less scary that actual maybe really soon death.”

“The crack inside me turns to a fissure turns to a split.”

“I am a hell-breathing fire monster and I will not totter.”

“Explain to me what the point of living is if you aren’t willing to fight for the truths in your heart, to risk getting hurt. You have to rage.”
I really loved the twists and turns of this book, it reminds me of every creative writing lesson I’ve ever had – ‘remember to add a plot twist near the end, that’s what makes it good.’ But who really does that? It’s just one of those things that makes a half-decent book that everyone collectively ignores because, at the end of the day, it’s really hard to do. But This Raging Light definitely has a few of those plot-twists whirled in there, and I take my hat off to Estelle Laure because I haven’t read many authors who are able to pull it off.
Some of the writing in this book doesn’t make sense. Some of the writing is absolutely awful. Some of the writing makes me question the sanity of the editors who worked on this book. But some of the writing is beautiful. And that is why you should read this book. Because it makes you feel something and a lot of people go a very long time in their lives without feeling anything. I gave this book 4/5 stars on Goodreads because the writing was terrible but beautiful. It was paradoxical and even when I had put it down I still didn’t return to reality. I made a home inside this book and I stayed inside it because it was comfortable and confusing and messy but strangely it was perfect. This book was an escape for me, and I am nervous about starting my next book after this one because I’m worried I might not find that again. You should read this book, if not for the story then for the beautiful quotes in between the really awful writing.

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